Diet blues
Having read Harry Potter in a day-and-a-half, I feel energised and ready to tackle the world. OK, so I am 63 years old, but I love these fairy stories. And I am not alone. I remember when I was around 11 years old I got the biggest book of Russian Folk tales called "The Flying Ship". Unfortunately, I had no chance to even glance at it, because my Dad, who had a habit of coming home for lunch and have a siesta thereafter, asked if he could borrow it and I never saw it for three days! So, Harry Potter was great fun. Of course it's not as good as Philip Pullman's Northern Lights trilogy, but enjoyable just the same. By the way, the first movie made from the Pullman trilogy is supposed to be coming out in December!
OK, so back to reality. Well, the sun is shining, I have just cleaned the yard in the back and rearranged things that I have not had the energy to do since this cancer thing started (meaning since I moved last June!). Hurrah! The landlord is supposed to fix the upstairs bathroom and balcony while I am gone, so I cleared everything underneath.
My latest meshugenas is the food I eat. The raised blood glucose got me going and I am determined more than ever to shed the kilos and stave off diabetes. Wish me luck!
In any case, I found a software that tracks everything one eats and am trying it out for seven days. It's fascinating to see just how much sodium, sugar, etc there is in what I eat. This morning for breakfast I had matzah coffee - the Hungarian-Jewish breakfast, the only thing I ever put sugar in, and there went my daily allowance of sugar. Oy veh! Who would have thought.
In addition to this focus on food, I have also started walking and got a pedometer. Also, the rib is healing, so I can do my Qigong as well. So, things are looking up. I do have to rest sometimes, but overall my energy level is much better, and I can see flashes of normal energy levels, and I am now more confident that it will return. I have to admit that I've had my doubts.
One of the hardest things is coming to terms with the fact that you may never be the same as you were before – be it looks, energy, outlook, work. You have to reinvent yourself in many ways and there's no map to follow, because you don't want to talk to other people with the same problem, as you want to return to 'normal'. Yet, it's really nice to talk with people who went through it and have some insight. It's a very strange conundrum. I've talked about the twilight zone feeling before, and this is another one of those. Mind you, it's a good excuse for pondering again the existential question of youth: 'what will I do when I grow up'? What will I do and how will I change when I have recovered completely? It's a chance to change in a positive direction, but it's really hard not to look backward and grieve over what was lost.
OK, so back to reality. Well, the sun is shining, I have just cleaned the yard in the back and rearranged things that I have not had the energy to do since this cancer thing started (meaning since I moved last June!). Hurrah! The landlord is supposed to fix the upstairs bathroom and balcony while I am gone, so I cleared everything underneath.
My latest meshugenas is the food I eat. The raised blood glucose got me going and I am determined more than ever to shed the kilos and stave off diabetes. Wish me luck!
In any case, I found a software that tracks everything one eats and am trying it out for seven days. It's fascinating to see just how much sodium, sugar, etc there is in what I eat. This morning for breakfast I had matzah coffee - the Hungarian-Jewish breakfast, the only thing I ever put sugar in, and there went my daily allowance of sugar. Oy veh! Who would have thought.
In addition to this focus on food, I have also started walking and got a pedometer. Also, the rib is healing, so I can do my Qigong as well. So, things are looking up. I do have to rest sometimes, but overall my energy level is much better, and I can see flashes of normal energy levels, and I am now more confident that it will return. I have to admit that I've had my doubts.
One of the hardest things is coming to terms with the fact that you may never be the same as you were before – be it looks, energy, outlook, work. You have to reinvent yourself in many ways and there's no map to follow, because you don't want to talk to other people with the same problem, as you want to return to 'normal'. Yet, it's really nice to talk with people who went through it and have some insight. It's a very strange conundrum. I've talked about the twilight zone feeling before, and this is another one of those. Mind you, it's a good excuse for pondering again the existential question of youth: 'what will I do when I grow up'? What will I do and how will I change when I have recovered completely? It's a chance to change in a positive direction, but it's really hard not to look backward and grieve over what was lost.
Labels: breast cancer, psychology
posted by Unknown at 11:21 AM
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